This month's amazing scoliosis warrior is Laura. Like everyone who battles this condition she has definitely had her fair share of struggles with it and today she is sharing her amazing story. Thank you so much Laura for taking part in #ScoliosisStories you are an inspiration to those around you! 💜
My name is Laura and I am seventeen years
old. At the time of writing this, I am nearly ten months post-op, and two years
post-diagnosis. This time last year, I was suffering severe pain 24/7, with my
mind constantly worrying about when my surgery would be. I got to the point
where I never thought I’d get better, or be able to do the things that I enjoyed
again. But, now; well, I could not be better. I spend the majority of my time
pain-free, and now I see that all of the stresses of surgery were completely
and utterly worth it.
I think that one of the most important
parts of having a condition such as Scoliosis is raising awareness. It’s a
condition that not many people know of; I remember when I was first diagnosed,
hardly any of my friends understood what I was going through. So, when Ciara
asked me to write a piece for her blog, there was only one answer I could give.
Looking back, prior to my spinal fusion surgery, I realise how much it would
have helped to have read something like the Scoliosis Stories Series Ciara is
putting together. When no-one you know personally can understand why you’re in
pain, or why you can’t do certain activities, it is so comforting to read a
blog like this, and know that there are other people going through the same
thing as you. Talking about my back all of the time and joking about my
condition was my way of coping (although, I know this doesn’t work for
everyone): it made it seem less real. But, through speaking about it
constantly, I’m also raising awareness, and that’s something that I’ll never
stop doing.
I was first diagnosed with Scoliosis back in
June 2015. I’d actually sort of diagnosed myself before that; I’d always known
that my long legs were completely out of proportion with my short torso, and
doing a bit of research made it clear what condition I had. So, in going down
to my GP, there was no surprise when she told me I had Scoliosis. But, what was
a surprise was just how severe it was. I remember that, on the way into my
first appointment at the hospital, I’d thought: ‘I hope my curves are over
fifty degrees so I can have surgery’. Looking back, I can see that my diagnosis
affected me way more that I had let on. Coming out of the hospital with two
curves, confirmed to be eight-four and seventy-six degrees was something that,
on the outside, I took in my stride. But I knew that my right shoulder blade
was so prominent, none of my clothes fitted right.
I thought back to a wedding I had attended a year before; I wore a tight, Aztec
print dress and wedges, and I had felt good. But all I could think of was all
of the people that would have stared at me. I’m very much a person that keeps
their true emotions hidden, but now I know that was not the correct solution; I
urge anyone going through this to be honest with themselves and those around them.
Because of the insanely long waiting list
for an appointment at the Royal Orthopaedic Hospital (and the fact that it had
been scheduled on my birthday), my parents paid for a private appointment for
three months earlier. Even though I had no aspirations to do dancing or plumbing,
being told I could never have a career in either really illustrated just how
restrictive this condition was going to be. Obviously, the pain was a massive
part of my condition; I could not even lean over without feeling my rib jab
against my hip. But, the psychological side was also so impacting. Mental
health can be such a ‘taboo’ subject, when really, it is one of the conditions
that really need talking about the most. I restricted myself to t-shirts and
hoodies, even wearing them abroad in Greece, because I didn’t like it when
people stared. But, now I see that most people were just curious, and hardly
anyone was intentionally trying to be mean. My friends were so supportive, and
still are; they recognised that I coped best when we joked about my Scoliosis,
and, thanks to them, I was able to deal with the condition well.
There were only ever a couple of time when I
really hated my condition. The first was not being able to find a prom dress
that fitted. I really didn’t want to go to prom; social events weren’t really
my thing anyway, but I knew people would stare at my ‘hunch’ and ill-fitting
dress. But, in the end, I found the perfect way to enjoy myself. My GCSE
Textiles technician made my prom dress for me, and, despite it being the
hardest piece of sewing she’d ever have to
undertake, I was able to feel good, even if it was just for one night. The
second time I felt horrible was the only time I had a mean comment thrown at
me. It was in the PE changing rooms at school, and, despite the fact that I
always made sure I wore a vest top to cover my hunch, someone had felt the need
to say: ‘You look disgusting, I can’t even bare to look at you.’ At the time,
I’d shaken it off as a joke, but later I realised just how much this comment
had affected me. I felt worthless, like I’d never be able to achieve anything
because of my back. But, I wasn’t going to let comment like that get me down. I
was determined to not let my condition get the better of me (I am a Slytherin,
after all)! I fuelled my energy into revising for my GCSEs, and I was able to
forget about my condition. And, when I came out with six A*s and five As, I
knew my work had paid off.
But, eventually my surgery date came
around, and both of my curves had reached one-hundred degrees each. Like in the
past, I put of the façade of being cool and collective about the whole
situation, when, really, I was petrified. I’d had the call from the hospital
whilst I was on holiday in Cornwall, and so the timing was terrible. I had to
sit down immediately; all I wanted to do was scream. I just couldn’t do it. I
had been told that if I didn’t have the operation, I’d have severe arthritis by
twenty-five and likely be dead by forty. This is something no sixteen-year-old
girl should ever have to hear, and that’s why an early diagnosis is so, so
important. But, after nine days in hospital and six weeks at home, I returned
to sixth form, never feeling so good.
I’ve achieved so many things, thanks to my
surgery. It has given me my confidence back. I raised nearly £200 for Scoliosis
Association by selling candy-canes at school, as well as being made Deputy Head
Girl at school. Being able to go on days out to London to watch England play
rugby and Ludlow Castle for my history course really makes me see just how far
I’ve come. But, for me, the best feeling is seeing my scar in the mirror. My
scar not only represents my new, straight back, but it also reminds me of the
tough journey I went through. Although the past two years have been difficult
and painful, and at times brought me close to tears, it’s important that I
never forget them. Scoliosis doesn’t define me, but it is an important part of
me and I wouldn’t never wish to be rid of it. The progress and achievements I
have made have been because of my Scoliosis, whether it’s because of having a
pain-free back, or just not wanting to let my curves get in my way. Scoliosis
has transformed my life in so many ways, and I wouldn’t change it for the
world.
You can check out Laura's Blog here where she discusses her life with scoliosis here 💗
No comments
Post a Comment