Sunday 23 September 2018

What's Really Been Going On



I've been keeping a lot of you in the dark with regards why I'm back in Ireland. I'm home now over two months, can you believe that? A few months ago I had plans on moving to a town on the Amalfi Coast. So today I'm writing this post to explain to you why I gave up living in one of the most beautiful places in the world.

Flashback to last May, I was finishing up teaching in Catania (my favourite job to date) and I was on the hunt for my next teaching job -in Italy of course. I went to visit my friend who lived in Salerno for the year, also teaching English. I fell in love with the place, especially because of the fact that it was less than two hours from Rome on the train and it was on the beautiful Amalfi Coast. For the weekend I was there I explored a lot of the area, I went to Positano, Amalfi, Vietri Sul Mare, Furore and of course Salerno. I had already been in Sorrento and the Island of Capri two years previous so I just knew this area was breathtaking.

At this stage I was still waiting to hear back from the English Language Assistant Scheme about a job offer in another part of Italy -side note I went through the ELA scheme to get my job in Sicily, watch my video all about it here. Soon after I got a job offer in a city I wont mention, it was in the south and I just knew I wouldn't want to go there. I had a gut feeling about this. As well as this the transportation links from this place to the rest of Italy were very scarce which also worried me. Don't get me wrong, the region it was in was stunning however I knew I just couldn't go.



My friend got offered a job too in another part of Italy which meant she had to leave a private school she was also teaching in. Which meant there was a job opening and low and behold I got a job there. So for about two months I had planned to go and move to Salerno and work in a private school teaching English. I was delighted - at the time.

I even posted on twitter saying Italy would have me for another year. So time passed and the summer plans I had for a holiday with D went south and I ended up having to come home a month early. D had been rushing to try and finish his exams so he could move to America to start a Masters over there. We didn't know for sure whether it was going to happen or not but he did it and managed to get all his exams done!



So I came home in the beginning of July and started working  to earn money, I knew I needed a lot of money if I had to start a life for myself all over again in another city. Then it started, I began to get this feeling in my stomach, a feeling that was telling me that it wasn't my time to go back to Italy. That I was making the wrong decision. I ignored it and told nobody I began to think that this new job on the beautiful Amalfi Coast came at the wrong time.

I continued working, the feeling got stronger and stronger until one day I told my Mom. I said I feel like I shouldn't go, like it's a bad idea and I don't feel secure in making the decision at this moment in my life. So we decided that I would make a final decision in September - the month I would have to move. Next I told D, as usual he fully understood and supported me in whatever decision I would make, however even though I had a whole other month to make up my decision I knew it was already made. I was going to turn down a dream job based on an extremely bad gut instinct.



D came to visit me at the end of August to say goodbye to me before his big move to the States. It was definitely a very emotional trip full of amazing memories. After he moved I didn't realise how hard it would be to adjust to the new time difference between us. I knew being with my family was a good choice to help me transition and get back on track to having a some-what normal Long Distance relationship. Support during difficult times is all anyone needs.

Now, flash forward to now. Its the middle of September and I am in Ireland. I ended up turning down the job offer. But what am I doing now?



I'm taking this year to focus on me and to accomplish things I didn't have the chance to do since I was in Italy for two of the last 3 years and also being in final year in college. My goals are: to finally get my license, to work my ass off to save as much money as I possibly can for my future as I know I will be moving somewhere again. I need to buy things I desperately need, like a new laptop- the one I'm using right now is about 8 years old-, invest more time and money in my blog, since coming home my content has had a new lease of life so I am definitely enjoying it a lot more. I also want to save for a trip to the States in order to see D, and of course a CELTA course. With that I will be considered to get a teaching job anywhere, even though I have the experience and a TEFL cert, I want to better myself and get another cert under my belt.

Outfit Details: Jacket: Bershka | Tee: Newlook | Skirt: Penneys/Primark


I have a lot to focus on this year and I'm really looking forward to what I will do.
I always believe in what's for you won't pass you, so maybe I'm supposed to stay in Ireland for the year and work on myself. Have any of you ever turned down something you knew would have been an amazing experience based on a hunch/feeling you had telling that it wasn't a good idea?

All photos taken by @michelleswalsh


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6 comments

  1. Fair play to you Ciara!! Best of luck with everything x

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